guess im gonna blog something happened today.
yes, being forgetful leaving keys IN THE house was the bad day. especially whens NOBODY is at home AND NOBODY to ask for help for except for my brother maybe.well, his working and HIS going to be back at 7 HOPEFULLY so he could give me the SPARE key so I can go into the house and get everything done.
meanwhile i went down play with my flag cat( i term her flag cat cause she is always loiters around my flag. she is kinda warm today i should say,
when i first met her she kinda lick my leg( yes i wore slippers from that day onwards I NEVER WEAR SLIPPERS anymore) today, i didnt brought her any food, which is kinda sad of me. cause everythings at home. sorry oreo, thats her name given by my school bus friend haha. ShTeo
well i met her , she stretched herself i guess thats her greeting method i suppose.
as i claps she went towards my direction. and went around my legs circling. And today she started doing something weird.
she actually did this to my amaze
isnt she cute haha. and thats not it. she did something this left a mark at my leg by scratching at my leg.( maybe i done something wrong)and started licking my leg. haha some might felt eww, but its ok. i treat it as a form of showing care to me then.
then came 2 indian kids from my flag ( no offence) she started running after seeing the kid whom tried to touch her. i followed oreo afterwards. she hid at the staircase, and the indian kid walked away with her sister.
apart of oreo. before that i went out ( WHICH IS FINALLY?) and got my psp done. yeap its done now ready to play.
well i guess thats about it, back to sleeping session again to tune my bio clock (:
with sincere,alvin
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Alvin
yea. when further thoughts deep down my mind.idling for a few minutes, then i decide to type what i'm thinking now, actually its practically blank.
first i took a blank piece of paper. i started thinking, is it true that we were once like this? then i referred to the psychology textbook for reference, and came back here typing away. why am i wasting time thinking about this ok skip that that.
then i started staring blankly my ceiling looking at the lightings i had, i saw images of me young, doing foolish things such as vandalizing and such it just like like yesterday.
what i see now, right now studying as a Republican.
i felt somehow empty in somehow and somehow 'motivationless' all the work hard study hard for greater future thing its just not there anymore.because maybe i just see no light in what im doing now. this awfully slam me down to abyss, I JUST WASTED 1 SEMESTER just pops in my face.
take me back to my logical thinking, statistics , culture sense and cognitive processes.
its going to be a new semester, and im still ready to give in all i got despite the fact,'FAG' that i feel pointless in doing all this.
is this suppose to be all student's mindset. just to study for test. get grades, after school meet for soccer. or is it just me.to think about it, whats your motivation for school then. is it blur like smokes on the water?
it should be the time to wake up and take this into a serious consideration, are you 'Enlightened?'
you know the answer for yourself.
series of unlogical flow of paragaphing pardon me. your sincerely,alvin
and alvin will be having a super long hour sleeping session to tune his bio-clock back to normal again.
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Alvin
im back.. i was unable to get some sleep.. and yea i know i didnt blog for quite a while cause of the google thing..
i was thinking something deep, was i filial,am i fit to call myself a son of others or am i even fit to call my dad, dad?or mom, mom?.
i could recall vividly, that time it was during primary sch, my family was having a financial crisis, my dad went bankcrupt. because of some family disputes over the business.my dad put on a fake smile and say everything was ok.during that time i had a report card of red marks. failure was all over the report card. i was embarassed. when i was in the lift, i heard this shocking news it was my grandfather, he died.
its a tripple blow, or rather 2 blows first.cause i didnt show him the report card. cause its really sucky, i was ashamed.
well my grandfather was a good man, he taught me to be straight.or im crooked now. if without him ill lose in this paralex word of chaos without knowing wheres my aims are.it was him that made me woke up from being a rascal in the house. or should i say, a better attitude guy,if not ill be arrogant as an ass speaking shiat out of this crap.
during the wake, i was with my group of cousins, they attended the wake and stayed at my house for the 7 days. my aunt told me, my grandfather doted me the most, and also worried about me the most cause i was the black sheep(lousiest in study, attitude all those,) moral values and all those, which caused me semi awake. back to my cousin thing, we shared alot, and we all agreed that my grandfather was a good man, he brought union in this family,(except that bankcruptsy incident) he was the reason why are we cousins so united.
i should say i have the best set of cousins,grandfather, parents,friends.relatives. they refined me to be a better person.
i felt myself as a failure both a loser.as i done myself wrong,i didnt let my grandfather go in peace. which made what i am today. im very sure he is in heaven, blessing me as life is really smooth these years, no major crisis i should say. and results are getting better. but could be better.
if without my grandfather, what would be me today. a school dropout.? or some no life kid hanging outside home hoping for his death. or even gangs?
if without my parents, will i even live some comfortably? will i even to gradulate from secondary school?
if without my relatives and cousins, who is there to give me support, who is there to show me life, who im gonna persue to beat the target( which is impossible to)
if without my friends( or should i say the friends i know), will i be able to know whats life,will i be who i am today,or someone you might detest.
if you think your life sucks, think again. without the people around you will it be suckier? or even worse to the extreme.
thats one of the reason why am i such an optimistic person despite the changes in my life, from fallen sand to quicksand and thus able to walk on land straight.
so many thoughts to think, to think of your parents provide you, an i always yearn for more. is thats what resulted me today. this stage in life causing my parents working to death. they should be enjoying life rather than feeding me .
10 years from now, im not going to smoke, drink im going to be filial to my parents and loyal to my friends. in repay of what they have done. so my living motto now is live and NOT forget.
haha. suddenly able to typed so much crap. sorry for making you all read these junks. its just a random thought in my mind of i couldnt sleep. even though i shouldnt cry, and i did.
if you think this is really junk please dont mind, cause its just a thought in my mind. pardon me i really need to type it out. (: your sincerely, alvin
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Alvin